10/18/09 Leader's Guide

Real Relationships

The Week of October 18^th

Getting Started:

1) What couple do you know who have been married the longest?

2) Think of a long term relationship in your life. What have been some of the keys to making it work?

Going Deeper:

3) In verse 8, Paul tells those who are unmarried and widow that it would be good for them to remain unmarried? What are some of the advantages to being single? What are some of the challenges to being single?

Advantages - In verses 32 – 35, Paul says that those who are single are more apt to be free from concern, allowing them to secure undistracted devotion to the Lord. Spouses can get distracted from the Lord with each other.

Disadvantages – There’s peer pressure to get married; there’s the challenge of loneliness; there’s the challenge of sexual purity.

4) In verse 9, we find one of the reasons for getting married: to deal with lust. How would you counsel a couple who desires to get married for sexual reasons, even though they don’t appear to be ready for a marriage commitment?

They need to slow down in the physical department – diffusing as much temptation to allow them to focus on those neglected areas.

They need to speed up in the relational department – proactively working on those areas that will make them ready for the marriage commitment.

5) In verse 10-11, we see that God commands that we stay married. How does viewing this as a commandment affect your relationship with your spouse?

6) Verse 10 tells a wife not to separate from her husband. When could separating for a season be a good idea? When would it be a bad idea? What other options could you share?

7) Verse 11 Brings up the topic of divorce. How has divorce impacted your life? Do you have friends or family members who are divorced? Have you gone through a divorce? Drawing from your experience, what challenges have you faced as a result of divorce?

8) In what situations do you believe that God allows divorce? What Bible passages could you point to support your view?

Here are some of the grounds for divorce that some have offered from Scripture:

Adultery

Abandonment/Neglect

Abuse

See the following link for a reasonable treatment of the topic: HERE -

9) Verse 11 tells separated spouses to remain unmarried or else reconcile. If you had a Christian friend who was separated and saw no hope for reconciliation, what would you tell them to do? What Biblical backing would you have for your advice?

Putting It Into Practice:

10) Are you facing a relationship conflict. What can you do to work through the problem?

11) Do you know a marriage that is struggling, what could you do to reach out and help?

12) Take time to pray for the marriages in our church.